OUR LOVE | Set the Foundation in Your Relationship

February 9, 2018

When you hear the word "foundation" what do you think of? I think of the story, "Three Little Pigs". We all know the story... or at least I hope you know the story LOL! One pig built his house with straw, the second pig built his house with sticks, and the third pig built his house with bricks. The first two pigs rushed the process of building their homes and it only took them 1 day to build. The third pig took his time and built his house with bricks so it can withstand any trouble that might come his way. When the wolf came to destroy their homes, he "huffed and puffed" and blew away the homes made of straw and sticks. However, the house that was made with bricks built by the third pig, persevered


This is a very simple story but the message behind it is much deeper. The moral of the story is, "Taking your time to do something right pays off".

I will apply the meaning of this story to relationships. The foundation of many relationships today are built with straw and sticks. These relationships are led by feelings, lust, social media approval and stupid decisions.When your relationship lacks a firm (brick) foundation, any wolf (or trial) can occur and ruin the special bond you have with your significant other.


Many couples don't realize that rushing things ruins things.


When you rush building your foundation or you don't set a foundation at all, your relationship will crumble into filing for a divorce or separation. Building a foundation that will last forever takes time and this is something that should be set in stone while you're seriously dating. 


This may sound funny but you would be surprised with how many individuals lack common sense. The characteristics I mention in this blog post is common sense. When I say common sense I mean.... you shouldn't be doing things that you wouldn't want your partner to do to you. For instance, if I go hangout with a group of girlfriends and I never text my man the whole day on my whereabouts that is a red flag in our relationship. Vice Versa, if my man goes out with a group of guy friends and he's not checking in with me than.... I'm going to feel some type of way. If you're in a serious relationship, your boo shouldn't have to worry about where you're at. Your relationship isn't a guessing game. Remember.. treat your lover how you want to be treated ...common sense. 


So, how do you know when to set the foundation in your relationship? Well, if you can't picture yourself with anyone else and you know in your heart that you're dating your soulmate, than that's when you know. It's important to have a solid foundation so that when times get tough, you know where your relationship stands. A strong foundation has attributes such as these:


Loyalty. Who WOULDN'T want to be with someone who is loyal?! Anyone can go out to the world and be obnoxious but it takes a real man to appreciate the treasure he has. It's 2018 and people are out here wildinnnnn so if you have someone that is loyal, you better appreciate that person. Think about  football. If you are a die hard Raiders fan, I'm pretty sure you would subscribe to all their social media channels, you are rocking a Derek Carr jersey every Sunday, and you already bought your tickets to next season's game.... You just love to support your team because that's YOUR TEAM... That's LOYALTY! This example is no different when you're in a relationship. When you are happily taken, you will be present in your boo's life. You will cheer him on, make sure he has had something to eat, and build him up daily. Loyalty is when your actions speak for itself.



Understanding. Be quick to listen and slow to speak. I get it, your lover does something that will make you want to  do all these wrestling moves on him

haha! There will be days when you will grow frustrated and react off of negative emotions because things weren't done the way you wanted. If you're a girl reading this...maybe it's that time of month and you just feel moody but you have to FIGHT your emotions. Lashing out on your significant other will NOT help your relationship. Nobody wants to be with someone who complains and nags all the time. Be grown. Be a good listener. Be understanding. You will save yourself from a lot of unnecessary arguments. More importantly, you will gain PEACE :) 


I wish the dictionary had a better definition of frienship because there is a lot of value attached to this word. Friendship is important because you should be able to have fun and laugh while you're in a relationship. When things get too serious, it will feel too stressful and controlling. Avoid that. Learn how to let loose and enjoy the moment. Go out to the movies, go on an ice cream date, say a joke, have fun! Keep your friendship alive. 

Being in a relationship is no easy task and it doesn't always feel like the Valentine's Day hype we see on commercials. My boyfriend and I learned over time that it takes communication, forgiveness, fairness and patience to get us through the valleys. We learned what's acceptable and what's not. Don't rush building your foundation because you will learn along the way. We learn from our mistakes and we build from forgiveness and understanding. It's all about learning TOGETHER. Let your relationship be built with bricks, not straw or sticks and remember... "Taking your time to do something right, always pays off". Set the foundation in your relationship.






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